"On April 24, 1989, a child was welcomed into the world, possibly to the lyrics of Madonna’s Like a Prayer... I close my eyes, oh God I think I’m falling... Out of the sky, I close my eyes... Heaven help me.

       And just like that Danielle Alexis Murphree fell from the heavens and landed in Alabama. Her parents were both marines and her father was also an alcoholic preacher who beat her and gave her whiskey when she was four. She quickly determined, at the tender age of four, that dark liquids (other than red wine) were not good for her. For the next ten years, her neglectful mother, who was a professional swimmer, would spend all of her time writing a single computer program that only she was capable of writing. It was a very important program and she focused all of her time on the writing of it. Sadly, this left her with no time to tend to her lady garden which quickly grew out of control into a large, ginger bush.  Obviously, the mere sight of the ginger bush was emotionally scarring to young Dani driving her to madness at a very young age..."

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